Under Siege vs. Titanic



Titanic would be much better if the cook was a Navy SEAL.

I think one important consideration here is that, while both Erika Eleniak and Kate Winslet show their bosoms, Steven Seagal kicks ass and Leonardo DiCaprio doesn't. In fact, he just sinks to the bottom of the ocean. You gotta know that if Billy Zane pulled a gun in Under Siege, Segal would've stuck it up his ass and pulled the trigger 'til it went "click". And probably gouged out his eyes for good measure.

Ugh, I have to choose? Guess it has to be Titanic given how badly Seagal sucks. Casey Rback is as big a loser as his trying-too-hard-to-be-trendy name suggests. Sucks. Apoplectic. Gay. Donkey. Balls.