“Zorro, the Gay Blade” – Nathan’s Movie Challenge, Week 31
“What do the people need roads for? They never go anywhere.”
So, I’m starting to sense a theme of cheesy-ness with these three films.
Most Zorro tales are full of adventure – featuring swashbuckling sword fights, damsels in distress, and villains for the hero to overcome.
This Zorro also happens to have a gay twin brother.
The movie plays for cheap and obvious laughs most of the time and feels like it tries very hard to ape the style of Mel Brooks’s films, but something doesn’t quite click about it.
It never really pushes past its ridiculousness to offer anything of real value. As with all humor, it’s subjective what garners a laugh. While this has plenty of situational comedy and over-the-top characters, it feels like a single joke played for the entire 93 minutes.
I will have to say, I wish the gay brother showed up nearer to the beginning of the story. He doesn’t even appear until almost the halfway mark. By then, you’re glad to see him magically appear to make the movie interesting again, but he’s only a temporary fix.
My favorite part of the whole show was Brenda Vaccaro as the jilted wife.
It probably doesn’t help that those 93 minutes somehow feel long. Also a bit frustrating when your main protagonist and antagonist both have accents so strong you can barely understand what they’re trying to say. Maybe pacing? Maybe just boredom? Not really sure. It just wasn’t my cup of tea. I don’t want to hear the word “peoples” again for quite some time.
Zorro, the Gay Blade was at the time of this review at #4956 on my Flickchart list of shame (ranked #6212 among the best films of all time). Here’s how it entered my chart:
Zorro, the Gay Blade vs. Machete
I think Machete is decent, but a little disappointing. Probably a more interesting character overall than Zorro.
Zorro, the Gay Blade vs. Orgazmo
I think Orgazmo might be the cult favorite of all of Trey Parker and Matt Stone’s work. It’s vulgar and ridiculous in the ways only they can be. Funnier than Zorro.
Zorro, the Gay Blade vs. Howard the Duck
It’s a George Lucas movie. It’s a Marvel movie. It was made easily 30 years too soon. Cool ILM monster effects, though!
Zorro, the Gay Blade vs. Awakenings
Any time Robin Williams goes dramatic, I’m pretty hooked. While this one isn’t the best of those, it’s still decent.
Zorro, the Gay Blade vs. Hot Shots! Part Deux
Another spoof and parody film, and a pretty funny one. More jokes per second that land for me, for sure.
Zorro, the Gay Blade vs. Casper
Ok, Zorro. You win this one.
Zorro, the Gay Blade vs. 54
Zorro wins this one, too. 54 is highly forgettable.
Zorro, the Gay Blade vs. Red Heat
Classic Arnie beats a lot of stuff.
Zorro, the Gay Blade vs. Silent Running
Yeeesh. Silent Running was rough. Zorro is the better film.
Zorro, the Gay Blade vs. Spy Kids 2: The Island of Lost Dreams
Zorro wins here, too. A lackluster sequel with nothing that sticks in my mind.
Zorro, the Gay Blade vs. Dead Snow
Come, on Nazi zombies! Bringing up the rear, as usual. Total coin flip. I guess it looks more interesting, visually.
Zorro, the Gay Blade is now ranked #1493 out of 1529 movies on my Best Movies of All-Time chart.
It’s now #9 on my Swashbuckling Films chart and ranked #10 out of all the movies I’ve seen from 1981.
Next up is Flash Gordon. In the meantime, check out the other films I’ve ranked during the challenge.
