Exorcist: The Beginning vs. Exorcist II: The Heretic

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Richard Burton plays perhaps the greatest priest ever known to man in all of filmdom with his virtuoso performance in Exorcist II: The Heretic. In it, he shows what it takes to expel a demon from a body. Latin chanting and throwing holy water? Fine and good for wimps like Max von Sydow and Stellan Skarsgard. You can claim those methods work all you want, the Vatican's book of exorcisms says you should use them, blah blah blah at the end of the day all you're really doing is making the demon slightly wetter than it already was and confusing it with a dead language. No, if you really want to exorcise a demon, follow Richard Burton, Manly Priest, and his method of exorcism: Step 1: Make out with an 18-year-old. Step 2: PUNCH THAT DEMON STRAIGHT BACK TO HELL!