“Rocky” – Nathan’s Movie Challenge, Week 12

“Beethoven was deaf. Helen Keller was blind. I think Rocky’s got a good chance.”

I really don’t get it. Why did this win Best Picture? Why did this spawn six (!) sequels?

The acting is stilted, there’s unintentional comedy from virtually every major actor in the film, the characters are very one-dimensional, it doesn’t have a particularly well-defined look, the editing is sometimes jarring, and barely anything happens in terms of plot.

Here’s what the plot consists of:

“A dumb, asshole boxer pursues a shy girl. The girl’s brother is a dick, and irritatingly won’t shut up about wanting to be introduced to a loan shark. The boxer gets picked almost randomly to lose a high-profile fight, which he then proceeds to lose by getting pummeled for twelve rounds.”

What’s the point of this movie? The only character with an arc (albeit, a very tiny one) is the girl, Adrienne. She’s the only one I can even relate to. Everyone else is detestable. I guess the point is that Rocky doesn’t win, and it’s not a “happy Hollywood ending”, but then what is the viewer supposed to take away from it?

I genuinely thought and hoped it would have been a better film that it is. Maybe someone in the comments can point to some particularly good critical essays on Rocky that shed some kind of light on what it is that I’m apparently missing.

I sure hope Raging Bull is better than Rocky.

Rocky was at the time of this review at #30 on my Flickchart list of shame (ranked #99 among the best movies of all time). Here’s how it entered my chart:

Rocky vs. Silent Hill

I’m pretty convinced that Silent Hill is the best directly-adapted video game film to date. Beats Rocky.

Rocky vs. Chicago

It’s a great musical. It actually deserved to win Best Picture. It also beats Rocky.

Rocky vs. Speed 2: Cruise Control

Ok, Rocky wins.

Rocky vs. Robin Hood: Men in Tights

It’s hard to hate Men in Tights, but it’s not really a great movie. I’ll give it to Rocky – but just barely.

Rocky vs. Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1978)

Wasn’t a huge fan of Snatchers, but it’s better than Rocky.

Rocky vs. Problem Child 2

Yeah, no. Rocky is going to pummel an unnecessary juvenile sequel.

Rocky vs. Fantastic Voyage

Raquel Welch. Cool sets. Great premise. Totally blows Rocky away. Will have to re-rank it, as it has no business being as low as it is on my chart.

Rocky is now ranked #1055 out of 1386 movies on my Best Movies of All-Time chart.

It’s now my 8th favorite Sports Drama and my #2 of 1976 (way, way behind Taxi Driver).

Last up is Marathon Man next.In the meantime, check out the other films I’ve ranked during the challenge.